Whine and Cheese

:::climbs on soap box:::

My friends will tell you that if you’re looking for someone to pity you, feel bad for you and help you wallow in a pool of self-doubt that I am not the one. It’s not that I’m mean (well, maybe I’m a little mean – but not to my friends . . . usually); I just have very little patience for pity parties. Granted, the closer we are, the more I’m going to entertain your pity party (trust me, I’ve been entertaining some for years) but if you’re not on the “inner circle” you’re pretty much S.O.L. Sorry. That’s just how I am. I think it all goes back to my own “bounceback-ability.” I struggle to stay down for extended amounts of time. I’m pretty sure we talked about this – it’s why I was so frustrated that it was taking me so long to get over the Voldy thing. Because, for the most part, it doesn’t take me long to get over stuff.

And, all of this isn’t to say that I am unfeeling or unsympathetic to people. I totally understand that some things (divorce, a break-up, death) take wwwwwwaaaaaaayyyyyyy longer than others to get over (a broken nail, for example). But I always struggle with how long is too long to have a pity party? Not only because it annoys your friends (hey, You, I’m annoyed!) but, also, because at a certain point shouldn’t YOU get tired of feeling bad and telling everyone how bad you feel?

Last night, I was talking to HMCA (I know, it’s been a minute since I mentioned him on here. It’s just that, well, eh . . . I don’t know . . . read here). We got  into a conversation (over text message – he completely interrupted my viewing of the Britney Spears documentary and Real Housewives of Orange County) about how everything is the same and he wishes something would be different. He was telling me how when he was younger he always dreamed of this great life that he’d provide for himself and his family. And that before he never knew how he’d do it, just that he was going to do it. But, now, that he knows how he’s going to do it – music (don’t get me started on the impossible dream) – and it just seems too unattainable. He then continued to whine (sorry, but if you’re reading this, you were whining) about how he didn’t know where to start, or what to do, or blah blah blah (see, I told you I don’t have much patience for it).

Now, my brother is just like HMCA and wants to get into the music business. Actually, I’d say that he’s already got a foot in the door. My brother started heading to a local studio in the Glass City to start recording with one of my friends. He was, like, 11 at the time. He has just kept it going from there. Taking things one step at a time. Recording an album, then another album. Working on a small distribution deal. Setting up shop on iTunes (yes, you can download my brother – “Segregated” by Cez Dejanero). He didn’t have a guidebook or an outline or a job description. He just had his passion and his work ethic. Now, he’s set-up a little recording studio in his bedroom at my house complete with mixers, microphones and more recording equipment than I ever care to learn the names of. Same dream, two different work ethics . . . two different journeys. My brother is doing his “thang” selling/producing beats and recording music. HMCA is whining to me via text message. See . . . I am SO NOT the one!

And that’s the thing that I don’t understand – if you’re passionate about something or you want something you find a way to go after it. My brother works a full-time job every single day and still finds a way to do business (yes people, he’s not just recording ish and putting it on myspace – he’s got a BIZNASS). When I wanted to lose weight last year I didn’t just sit around the house and whine about it. No, I took my butt to the gym, hired a trainer and changed my lifestyle. And, I have the scale to prove it. When Ken and I went from living down the street from each other to more than 2 hours away, we still figured out how to see each other three and four times a month. Sometimes twice in one week. You find a way or make a way for what it is you really want in life.

Someone once told me that “work will win where wishing won’t.” It was probably the same person who told me “in order to get something you’ve never had, you have to do something you’ve never done.”

So, my dear readers, what is it that you’re whining about or have become complacent about (I’m whining about my lack of a date and this fool who keeps chopping and screwing me . . . I’ll stop now)? Is it the desire to have a man/woman in your life? Going after a newer, better job? Buying a house or a car? Losing a few pounds . . . being more social? I’m challenging you to find a way or make a way for what it is you really want. And to my friends, if you see me falling into the pity party trap, you’ve got my full permission to put me in check. And, if I find you doing it – you might just find yourself reading about it. I’m just sayin’ . . .

:::steps down:::

Signed,
Put Your Money Where Your Mouth Is Barbie

~ by countryclubbarbie on December 4, 2008.